Open Communication Post

[coldsong]

If you have a message for me, by all means, leave it here. If it interests me, I will respond at some point.

If it's an urgent matter, I will, of course, require a bribe or other incentive. Don't waste my time.


((For nexus_crossings, this is Loki's PINpoint extension. Otherwise, either he has a phone or you're contacting him through psychic/spiritual means, I suppose. Have at.))

Comments

[magpiemythos]

I made you something!

It's called I Can’t Hear You Over the Sound of my Awesomeness and if you tell me it's not your peak aesthetic I'm going to call you a dirty rotten liar.

[coldsong]

I...am genuinely uncertain how to respond to this. [It takes a Loki to render another Loki speechless. Or even anywhere close to speechless.]

Part of me wants to know where in the name of all that's sacred you found that photograph, but most of me is just delighted.

I would hate for you to have to call me a liar.

[magpiemythos]

[He's a winner!]

I have my ways! I'm sure you've yours too!

But yes, I'd much rather you be pleased, it took some doing to find the right photos to make this work.

[coldsong]

[They both are!]

I do, but generally those ways don't involve using photoshop.

Do you know, Thor didn't like that outfit. He said I was dressed like a witch.

[magpiemythos]

See that's why I don't listen to Thor when it comes to fashion.

[coldsong]

Indeed. I like the wing motif, but I've always felt the huge searing-red cape was a questionable choice. But he seems to like being a moving target in a battle.

[magpiemythos]

Well think of it this way- the more attention paid to him in a fight the less anyone is looking at us. And goodness but we can get quite a lot done that way, can't we?

[coldsong]

Ssh, don't tell him we're using him as a distraction!

[magpiemythos]

He won't hear it from me! Not that it'd stop him charging in either way, I mean it's Thor after all.

[coldsong]

Speaking of Thor, do you suppose your photoshoppery skills are up to placing an image of him upon a label?

I've recently discovered protein powders and snack bars in the Nexus grocery, and Thor would be a much better poster-boy for them than the anonymous fool that's on the packaging right now.

[Text Message]

[pirateangelbaby]

Brother

I'm going to be with the Avengers for a while. There might be something left to try. I want to let you know just in case you can't reach me. Say hello to the children for me.

You've been a great comfort to me these past few months. I'm sorry that I haven't been a better one to you. Norns willing, I'll still make it up to you. I couldn't have made it this far alone.

Never doubt that I love you.

[coldsong]

Well. That's simultaneously touching and terrifying. It sounds like the letter a soldier sends home the night before a vital battle. Loki freezes up for several long minutes before he manages to force his fingers to type out some kind of reply:

One the one hand I'm glad you let me know something was up. On the other hand now I'm going to be worrying until you return.

Loki surprises himself, then:

I wish I could come with you.

Does he? He hates the sound of this venture already, and yet...yes, he hates far more the idea of Thor wandering into danger without him. Damn.

There's no question, though. Even if it was Loki's place to throw his lot in with another world, which it's not, he has children to care for, he has projects, he has a psychopath breathing down the back of his girlfriend's neck. And also the Grandmaster is still somewhere in the Nexus, he suspects, or at least has access, and that definitely bears watching.

I love you too, Brother.

Don't do anything stupider than you would if I were there to roll my eyes at you.

[pirateangelbaby]

With the Benatar, the flight from Norway to New York is only going to be a short one, but Thor's refusal to sit up in the cockpit on the way buys him a small measure of privacy, something he may not have as much of once the Avengers are assembled. The longer the silence stretches after he sends his message, the tighter his anxiety seems to coil in his chest, until at last Stormbreaker hums in his grasp and relays the message, and he lets out his breath.

I wish you could come too.

Even without the responsibilities that Loki has, of course, Thor knows that his human friends would never allow it. They've known him only as an enemy, the twisted tormented thing that the Titan had made of him, and the person he has forged himself into in the aftermath. Thor does not begrudge them that right. But one hellish decade does not erase centuries of brotherhood either, blood or not. And perhaps it is selfish of Thor to want his brother there, to lean on him for strength when he's already given so much with so little in return, but Thor wishes for it all the same.

Under different circumstances he might be tempted to make light of it, to ease his brother's concerns with a lighthearted remark, but he has none to give. Not today. I'll do my best.

[coldsong]

Of course, the venture they propose is exactly the thing that Loki would classify as stupider than Thor would do if Loki were around to roll his eyes. It's best he doesn't know that. It says something about his and Thor's relationship that after a moment of reflection he sends:

Don't tell me what you're doing. It'll only make it worse, waiting.

If he had any inkling Thor might end up facing Thanos yet again, he'd be apoplectic.

Please come back. Try to come back. I need you. Not 'you're the king and our people need you'. It's more personal than that.

[pirateangelbaby]

If Thor had any clue he'd be facing Thanos again, he might never have left Norway at all. In all his long years, there have been very few enemies that the god of thunder truly fears. Only one who has managed to destroy him so thoroughly, even in death. Only one who has beaten failure into his bones and despair into his heart. No matter how much progress Thor has made over these past few weeks, little by little, they are lessons that will stay with him forever, reminded of it every time he sees the arm made to replace the one that was taken from him.

Perhaps it's for the best that he doesn't know. This plan seems insane enough as it is, what little Thor has heard of what the Avengers intend to attempt. It may not even work at all. But despite how deeply he has been beaten and broken, despite the grief and guilt that has mired him in depression and anxiety for months, there is yet a spark at Thor's heart that knows he cannot walk away from this, as surely as a moth cannot turn from the flame.

It has been so difficult for Thor to feel needed, to let himself accept that there are those who still love him, his brother most of all. But Loki has been at his side this whole horrible time, whether in flesh or in spirit, his little messages and photos one of the few things that Thor has looked forward to from day to day, even if he has been terrible at showing his gratitude. Thor is not the only one who has lost, and lost, and lost. If anyone needs him, truly, it is Loki.

I will come to you when it's done, he promises, though he knows not what state he might be in this time. He knows better than to hope for victory, to assume he will return triumphant, that this will heal his scars and return him to the man he once was. These wounds run too deep. But perhaps that will be what saves him, should they fail; he has been broken on hope's promises before, and it will be a long time before he trusts it so thoroughly again. Better to bury his heart, and shield it from whatever heartbreak is yet to come. I miss you.

[coldsong]

Loki is trying to hard to hold everything together, multiple thin threads of concentration tied to each of the events set in motion around him. His world, dying. Thor's world, also treading turbulent cosmic waters. Thor himself, on a knife's edge between functional grief and total despair. Harley, in danger. The children, in painfully slow recovery from their trauma. There is so little time to feel, and for the longest time Loki did his best to avoid feeling anything but rage, but he was coming out of that.

Sooner or later, the frantic motion will slow and halt, one way or another. Things will stop happening, and he will be alone, or mostly alone, with himself once more. He's not entirely sure what self that will be, although he's confident it can't be worse than the last couple selves he's been through.

For a moment, and not for the first time, he wishes he could break, completely, and just crawl away wounded and lie in a quiet place, need and love and responsibility be damned. It seems he's so often on the edge of destruction, without being quite far gone enough to let go.

He starts to type, I'm tired... but erases it before he hits send. Instead, a moment later:

You'd better, or I'll come find you myself. As if that's a threat.

If you miss me so much, you'd better get on with whatever you're doing and be done with it so you can get back here. He can't, he can't, he can't keep talking to Thor like he might not come back. His chest feels tight, throat closing up with unshed tears, and that way lies panic.

Be careful Thor. I will see you soon.

[pirateangelbaby]

Through text, of course, Thor cannot see Loki's mood or guess at his thoughts. If he knew how distressed his messages were making his brother, it would certainly add to his guilt. He'd only intended to ensure that Loki would not worry about his potential silence in the coming days... and to secretly make sure that if the worst should happen, that this could serve as a chance to say goodbye, something that has been denied them both at nearly every turn.

Of course Loki would see right through him, and understand what this is.

But Thor does not know this, and maybe he is protecting himself from that realization as he reads his brother's reply. I will. See you soon.

text

[lokiyouarenothelping]

Is there anything at all interesting going on in Nexus? I'd ask my brother, but I think just being outside Asgard is interesting for Thor, anytime.

Me, not necessarily. So tell me if there's anything fun, I might come here then.

Not sure why I'm asking you, but. Just felt like doing so.

[coldsong]

[Oh, Norns. That's the kind of question that demands a week's answer to respond to fully. Lucky for them both that Loki is the sort of person that prefers to let people find out details on their own, and assumes his alternate is the sort that prefers to do the finding for himself, as well.]

Well, the place has been swarming with angels and demons lately, that's interesting, I suppose. I've been somewhat unwell, or I'd be involved in more things.

There's some sort of musical festival that seems to be occurring just now, though. You may still catch it if you come soon enough.

[lokiyouarenothelping]

[Maybe calling this guy WAS a good choice. Short and precise, but inviting, hmm? So, in a hour or three - and he's now suddenly wondering whether Heimdall can see Nexus and how to ASK without telling - he replies]

Festival? I see. I might check it out. Thank you, Helblindi. Oh, I so hope Thor's not making a fool of himself on this festival.

[desertpowered]

When Flygon lands outside Loki's house, he's carrying a package. Inside is an ivory crysknife and a note in Paul's handwriting.

I won't be returning to the Nexus for a long time, if ever. Circumstances in my home universe and I myself have changed in such a way that I would be risking the safety of this place by coming here. I have created something terrible, and the story behind it is long, but I feel a responsibility to stay at the helm.

The blade is a gift to Agnarr. It's sacred to us here, and I ask that he treasure it and keep it safe. If you need the Casket, it's in my old quarters in the urban area. I've provided a map with directions. It's hidden in a safe place.

Remember me as I was, and should we never meet again in this place, take care of yourself and the children. Whatever I've become now, and whatever I will be in the future, I will always be your friend.

Paul

[coldsong]

This is a lot to process, and Loki takes time to do so by immediately hunting out and fetching the Casket. The one from his own universe remains in the care of Bucky Barnes. Having this one in his own hands is a temptation, but he's gotten better at coping with those of late.

Besides, Thor keeps making noise about diplomatic relations with Jotunheim. This could help.

Once this work is done, he sits the children down, reads the letter to them, and gives Agnarr the gift.

"Circumstances beyond his control, perhaps," he tells them gently. "Although you all know I see a bit of myself in him. We can ask the Norns to spare him the worst of whatever tale they are writing in his world."

Then again, fate and prophecy are not exactly working in Paul's favor. "I hope we will see him again."

Agnarr, to his credit, handles the blade with reverence, delicate with it. It's a pretty, deadly thing. He will make a sheath from Vanaheim deer-leather, and keep it well, wearing it at his hip whenever he ventures into the Wilds.

It's possible he'll find the White Queen there, and share the news with her, since she has no place to receive letters.

[shyhulud]

There's something strange out in the more desert parts of the Wilds.

Perhaps someone might see an unusually large dust cloud, or the way landmarks disappear. Something very big is out there. It's surprisingly good at hiding itself for something so gigantic.

Paul did it again.