TFLN/Overflow Post: Safe Edition

[coldsong]

Comments

[coldsong]

((Continued))

Interesting. I am, in fact, given to mysticism and occasionally religiosity, but knowing so little about your kind, it would be insulting for me to speculate.

I am a Trickster god, and thus I am nothing but filters, to the point where I occasionally misdirect myself. It's an occupational hazard. But I do tell the truth more often than I am believed, particularly when I'm interested in the outcome of a conversation or seeking friendly acquaintanceship.

I'm also a shapeshifter. Appearance is not necessarily a reliable way to tell one Loki from another.

[adpacempertyrannidem]

I'm a shapeshifter, too...but I turn into a tank. I am sceptical of gods, although I certainly believe that you exist. There are a lot of beings that people call gods, and they're different in their powers and abilities.

I'm not given to worshipping anything. I haven't ever found humbling myself and letting it be known exactly how helpless I am in a given situation to be advantageous in any way, and the 'gods' of my people seem reliably to favour people who are not like me and mine. I do hope you won't hold that against me.

Despite my general lack of filters, I share with you that issue where I tell the truth more often than I am believed. People expect me to lie, and I rarely bother. I have told people exactly what I intended to do, and they have still been shocked that I did it.

Do you want to sit down somewhere and talk, or do you enjoy texting?

[adpacempertyrannidem]

Well, I do not anticipate getting close enough to you to burn you! I've never attempted to expand myself, but if it's really easier, perhaps I should try sometime.

The coordinates should be fine.

[Now Megatron's wondering what to expect from Loki! He's unfiltered, but his propositions are generally unmistakeable for anything other than what they are, and that was not one of them! ^_~]

Switching to prose format, if that's all right with you!

[coldsong]

Maybe that was a little Freudian. Loki can't deny his extreme curiosity. The shapeshifting, Ravage's ability to project images, and the general durability and versatility of these mechanical beings remind him of some of his own gifts, and yet they are vastly different.

On the other hand, he has some truly traumatic memories associated with hot metal too close to vulnerable skin, and the commentary was at least halfway born of anxiety. It's his way to make light of these things, so he types: Certainly not on a first date, then erases it before he sends the text, opting instead to simply send the set of coordinates.

This accomplished, he makes his way to the meeting-spot himself, riding the autumn wind.

When he arrives, Megatron will find it looks very little like a 'hall' of any sort, at least from the outside. What is there is an open field, a tumble of bare rocks twice the size of a human dwelling, and a dead tree carved with the symbol of a reddened eye. If he is at all sensitive to the kind of energy flux Loki would call magic, though, he may sense there is more here than is easily seen. A cavernous space under the rock, under the ground, which will open only when Loki commands it.

Loki himself, is waiting, seated cross-legged on one of the boulders, already in Jotun form. The ridged cobalt skin stands out against the black of his clothing and hair, and his eyes, like the symbol on the tree above him, are ruby red.

"Well met," he says, and gives a graceful, seated bow, studying his guest in return.

[adpacempertyrannidem]

"You should actually talk to Ravage about some of this," Megatron says, with some surprise. "I wouldn't tell you this if it were an actual secret, but quite a few people know about this now. Ravage had surgery for an unrelated condition during the time he was living with me, and part of the treatment involved regrowing bits of him that had been broken. During that time he had to be gene-scanned, and we found out that he--and possibly his siblings--were made using genetic material from an old precursor species on Cybertron that very little is known about. There are unfortunately none of them left, but they were also rumoured to be monstrous and savage. I think he'd be able to relate to the confusion you must be feeling, and though he's irascible at times, he's very kind. I felt a bit inadequate at the time, because all I could do was reassure him that it didn't change how I felt about him, and it wouldn't matter to anyone else who cared for him. Were you at least able to speak to other Frost Giants about your situation?"

He leans back. "I very much agree that learning and knowledge are pleasures in and of themselves. What exactly would you like to compare notes about?"

[coldsong]

Now, that isn't something he expected to hear, and he tilts his head, a flicker of interest in his eyes. He fully intends to do his best to make friends of the others, as well, but it's interesting to hear he might have something in common with Ravage, beyond similar haunting fears and mutual soft spots for children. "I...will mention it to him. That is a close parallel."

He shakes his head. "Not really. Had I made it a priority, I could have spoken to them, perhaps, but I suffered a sort of psychotic break. I killed my biological father--and I don't regret that. By all accounts, he left me to die as an infant. But I also attacked Jotunheim and that, in retrospect, was unconscionable. Bridges have been thoroughly burned, I fear."

"I have my own alternates to consult, but as they're from different worlds it's hard to say how much parallels my own. My twin is the best-versed in what Frost Giants are actually like, and he doesn't have much that's pleasant to say about them. But any people can suffer under poor conditions or poor leadership."

He smiles at the question. "What I should say, I suppose, is that I hope we will speak again. Your openness has been refreshing. Is there nothing you would ask of me?"

[adpacempertyrannidem]

"Good." Megatron grins. "You've given me a lot to think about, and you're pleasant to listen to--give me a moment, I'll have to go back to a few things you said before."

He pulls in air, almost as if he were breathing.

"First of all--yes. It is terrifying. Especially since there seems to be some sort of economy in place and something, somewhere, has to be running it. I'm not sure what a seasonal spirit is, but I'm going to guess it's a sort of noncorporeal sapient entity that's involved with the biosphere? How much do they interact with the inhabitants?"

He glances aside. "I expect them to go home to deal with conflicts there. I simply wish they wouldn't. They deserve to be free of that mess, but of course, they don't see it that way. I think they plan to make this place their home base, so that they can't be found by their enemies until they've dealt with them all. After that, or if they fail, which I don't think they will, it will be...a vacation home, I suppose. If Galvatron, Scorponok, Shockwave, or the DJD show up here, I don't think they'll stay, as long as the anti-violence field is doing its job."

[coldsong]

Loki actually seems mildly surprised by the vehemence of that good, as if he wasn't quite sure whether Megatron actually wanted friendship, or something more like an alliance with occasional chats over tea and diesel. In all honesty, it's not especially common for strangers to go out on a limb to obtain his company, either. The surprise dissolves into a sheepish smile, and a cough to clear his throat, but he only nods his assent to clarifying what he's said.

"There are several business associations," he says. "And some of them trade across worlds in order to manage currency exchanges here. It's weird, but I believe the economy is something the residents here have managed to build naturally, over time."

"As far as the spirits, yes, you have the gist of it. Does your planet have weather that changes with its orbit? Asgard, where I grew up, did, though it was an atypical planetoid. The spirits interact rarely; they're not hard to avoid speaking with, really. I've spent a fair amount of time with both Autumn and Winter, and spoken with Spring once."

He hums thoughtfully. "They're not the first to use this place as a safe-house or planning ground. I would advise care and considerable warding. No fortress is impregnable, the Nexus included. I'll mention it to them personally. I think I like Ravage anyway, and an alliance would be to my advantage, as well."

"I...have children, you see. Adopted. Four of them."

[adpacempertyrannidem]

"It was very well done. I rewarded him for it, as he rightly deserved." Megatron smirks a little. "I'd love to play the game with you, and your daughter. With appropriate stakes, of course, and not the stakes I used to put up with Ravage."

He sighs. "I've just come to appreciate how much I need to be around people who know the scent of my demons. I may be older than you, but you've been working at controlling yours much longer than I have been. It's been...barely a year, maybe two? --time at that scale means almost nothing to me, it's moments, like this one, and eons, that matter. I want to be known, but I don't want to hurt anyone, any more. I was once in a field of flowers. There was one flower there for every life that was lost because of something I'd done, and the end of them all wasn't visible. I know I can't avoid causing pain, no-one can--but I don't want to do it on purpose ever again."

He shrugs a little cavalierly, as if trying to pretend what he ust said wasn't some sort of stupid confession.

"And yes, I want to learn about magic. I made one or two attempts at it with Ravage, during desperate times, to no avail. I want to know about things that can cause me and those I love harm; I want to know how to protect and defend them, and protect and defend myself so I can go on doing that. I don't like being ignorant of anything with strategic uses, or anything of importance. In fact, though I don't know at all what I want to do with the rest of my life...I know that I want to spend it learning. I started all this, all the madness, because they denied me that."

[coldsong]

"I cannot tell you how pleased I would be to see her become a poet as well as a performer. Of all of them, she is the most attuned to my nature and abilities. She will be a mage some day, I think, and quite possibly a shapeshifter."

The talk of endless fields of flowers sobers him visibly. There is something that flickers in his face and eyes, a glimpse of a shattered soldier's thousand-yard stare. After a moment he says, "Your philosophy there matches mine. I am...not sure how many flowers I would have. Some of my memories are still missing and distorted."

He hesitates, lips parted, as if he's not sure whether he should elaborate, but the way he struggles to focus on Megatron's next words, regarding learning, which he would normally heartily encourage, tells him he needs to explain.

"There was a cult I fell in with," he says. "After being exiled from home. The Black Order. Their leader was called Thanos, the Mad Titan. It was his belief that the universe has too few resources for the life forms contained within it, and that to prevent an eventual apocalypse of death by starvation and dehydration, the one foolproof solution was to kill half of everything, everywhere."

"I had nowhere else to go, and they would not have allowed me to leave if I had tried, and so at first I played along, thinking it was impossible for him to act on his designs. But it wasn't impossible. The first planet I attended the Cull on was small; its inhabitants knew nothing of space travel or other worlds, and they had nothing beyond projectile weapons to defend themselves. It was...quick. And it was awful. And I was punished afterwards for not doing my part, because I froze."

"I think almost two billion souls must have died in that Cull alone."

for Ravage

[coldsong]

continued from here

It's after nightfall, and the children are indoors, asleep. Mrs. Hedgeworthy, Loki's housekeeper, is staying the night, but he is grateful to find he is less desperate for the backup than he was before he left.

Outside the cottage, the meadow is all long grass in shades of tan and fawn and brown, and every breeze makes the seedheads whisper together. Loki likes this weather; he is sorry to have missed spring and summer, but the promise of winter is reassuring.

Re: for Ravage

[dontpetmeibite]

"Hello," says Ravage lightly. "Soundwave would like to join us, with your permission. He's protective of me, and we don't know you well. Is that all right? I have no secrets from him. He's a telepath. I can't. I understand if you decline, and you are well within your rights to say that what's between you is for you two alone. But I am concerned, because the relationship between myself and Megatron is called amica endura and it's my job to take care of him if he's hurt again like he was before, only I can't do it the way that I used to."

[Not that you're supposed to help your amica THAT way, Ravage.]

For Megatron

[coldsong]

continued from here

Loki is standing outside his hall when Megatron arrives, and he is wearing his Asgardian form, ivory-skinned and green-eyed, with inky hair back in intricate braids and tied, incongruously, with a glittery purple ribbon.

"I have something for you," he says with a little smile. "I told the children I had a new friend, but that they will not be able to meet him for a few weeks. They're curious. They sent you a picture."

Because Asgardian kids are kids nevertheless. He holds out a large piece of construction paper, upon which is a riot of crayon and marker sprinkled with glitter glue. There appear to be four figures on the page. The tallest has medium-brown skin and black hair, and a green jacket. The second is in a blue dress, with honey-brown curls and a halo of musical notes around her head. The third is the smallest, and only identifiable as a person by the two eyes and the pink-marker smile, but there are little fish and shell stickers all over him. The last is very glittery, with blond braids and a sword bigger than she is tall.

Several different hands have written "HI!" across the top. And there are additional stickers, including flowers, horses, and rainbows.

[adpacempertyrannidem]

"You're going to let me meet them that soon?" Megatron is delighted, and grins at the drawing. "One of your sparklings is extremely sparkly," he observes. "Did she give you the ribbon? It's almost Decepticon purple. And the one in blue, that's Sigrid, isn't it?"

Megatron has actually never seen anything of this nature before and keeps looking at the paper like it's a rare artefact from a world he's never imagined, mostly because, well...it is. He never got to be a child.

Cybertronians are small for only a very short period of time, and most of them are raised in creches and post-natal facilities. In the days of Megatron's youth, there were powerful 'houses' where wealthy people who could afford to forge bodies especially for the newsparks of their choice were able to choose the heirs they wanted for their households, but even then, only a small minority of sparklings were taken into homes of that sort. Most were cared for in groups and given some degree of education appropriate for their function before being assigned a place in society.

Megatron didn't even get that. His spark was rare, but it was also not the spark that had been intended to go into that particular frame; he was treated like any other cold-construct at initialisation.

It surprised him that he was even interested in helping to raise children this small; he had promised Loki that he would protect everyone he loved, and he had offered to mentor Sigrid, but he had never had the slightest desire to work in a post-natal facility or handle sparklings before.

But they were people--tiny people, but people, and they wanted to be his friends. All they knew was that he was their father's dear friend, and they were welcoming him into their lives. He was beaming, and he was sure he looked ridiculous.

He was also very resolutely not going to think about the very strong likelihood that he had taken many lives as innocent and open as these. Except it was too late for that. But he refused to dwell on it. Someday they might learn this about him, and he'd tell them the truth, he supposed, and hope they forgave him.

"I have never seen anything like this before, Loki. And I will protect them," he says, "as if they were mine. And if this is how they see themselves then I am sure they're just as adorable as their father is."

He looks up at Loki, and dabs at his eyes with the towel Loki gave him days ago; he left it in his subspace. "I don't deserve this, but the universe doesn't give us what we deserve." He smiles. "So, I'll do my best to become someone who does."

[adpacempertyrannidem]

"Careful, my love." Megatron squeezes Loki's shoulders gently, steadying him.

After a moment, he sighs. "Shockwave is not who he once was. They shadowplayed him. But when we were all young, he was the only Senator worthy of the name. He put up the funds to ransom Ravage and the birds from Ratbat. If he'd managed to become the head of the House, he could've bought them outright and brought them and Soundwave home, but even though he couldn't get them free, he made it so that Ratbat could never lay hands on Ravage again. He tried to make the world a better place without the use of violence, but they took him away, and then they took his face and hands by empurata, and then they put their needles into his neck and brain, and he became completely emotionless. He remained a Decepticon, but he wasn't someone we could trust any more, because he valued almost nothing. He no longer felt love for his brother or for Ravage, but he felt no resentment because he felt freer without emotional ties. Yet he was once among the best of us."

Megatron sighs again. "Are these the stories you want to hear, on a beautiful day like this when we are together?"

[coldsong]

Loki's heart does a flip-flop at 'my love', and he tells it silently to behave itself.

Shockwave's story makes him shudder, though. There are to many dark parallels here, too; alarming could-have-beens. "Ravage mentioned shadowplay once, when we played the word association game. We could both tell we'd wandered into territory we did not wish to tread, and opted to turn back together."

"I understand better now. But no, absolutely not, these are not stories for a pleasant evening." He takes a breath and pulls back. "Shall I show you some of my other forms as we walk? I can be a snake or spider even in cold weather."

[adpacempertyrannidem]

"You are immeasurably worthy of love, and I felt that way before tonight, I assure you. I felt that way when I asked permission to court you, and when I took you to my bed, or rather my pillows--" Megatron smiles-- "and I will feel that way as long as I live, dulscintara."

It's strange, how much his life has changed in the past month or so. He's gone from looking back at his life, thinking it nearly over, with a heart full of regrets, to falling in love, and feeling hope, and looking forward to a future very different from his past, a home full of love, in a strange place between the worlds, with someone so perfect for him and yet so different from him that he couldn't ever even have begun to imagine her.

"I'll be ready for this life as soon as it's ready for me, I think," he says, stroking her hair. "There isn't much you can do to clear the way for me on my end; just tell me what to do, and when and how to do it, to make things right for us with your lovers, so that they understand I don't want to take you away from them, and that they're welcome in my life as well, and to ease the way for you and your children, so that they will see me as a friend, and a protector, and someone they may rely upon."

[coldsong]

"I know you felt that way," she says. "But I...rarely do. I know I am loved, by many, but...I think it's habit. I play tricks, I am a Trickster; some part of me feels I've tricked people into loving me. And I have disappointed those who wanted to believe in me more than I would like."

Her words are halting and awkward. This is a struggle to admit, and a struggle to put into words.

"I try not to measure my worth by others' standards. I know that even for the best of us, that's a fool's errand. But even a god has a beating heart."

She closes her eyes and smiles at the stroking. "I will work on all of that," she promises. "Yule is coming. I think perhaps a holiday activity would be a good way for the children to meet you. Though I will have duties at night-time, between the Solstice and the sixth of January."

For Ben

[coldsong]

((Continued))

We called it the Odensjakt, in Asgard. It is wild in the way any venture into the world beyond the material is wild. The dead ride through the wilderness, and sometimes into town. Anyone in their way will be taken up to ride with them.

A person such as yourself may find it a positive experience to join it. It can be spiritual, but at its heart it is a reminder that not everything can be under our control. Not even ourselves, sometimes.

[chiaro_oscuro]

You know, I think you're right. It might do me good to have an experience like that - I seek to master myself, my emotions and my darkness, but I know that it's work that will never be done. I wouldn't be opposed to joining the Hunt of my own will. As you told me once, the line between life and death is thin, and I have stood on both sides.

I'll see what happens when solstice comes. I don't believe you've met my friend Morrigan - she's a Pokemon called Corvisquire. She looks rather like a raven, in her appearance as well as her habits.

[adpacempertyrannidem]

Megatron chuckles. "I forget that you haven't met Laserbeak. If I were talking to birds, I would absolutely expect that the conversation would at least be repeated, if not overheard or recorded. That might be unfair to talking birds in principle, but I'm too used to using aviformers as spies myself."

He cuddles her close. "I'm glad you think that's fair. The anti-violence field doesn't operate equally well everywhere. And honestly, if someone came out of nowhere and started shooting at me with live fire, I doubt you'd sit idly by, either. There'd not be time to consider whether I deserved it or not."

[coldsong]

Loki gives a little laugh. "That's not always true of organic birds, but you make a fair point. I'm partial to corvids in general, but I wouldn't say they're always trustworthy. I'd probably like them less if they were."

"You're correct." She closes her eyes, comfortable in his arms. "I'm more likely to face aggression with trickery than shoot back, but you would not be undefended."

"I...like it, you know. I never expect friends or lovers to take my side or protect me, but it feels so good when they do."

For Glit

[coldsong]

[Continued from here]

I need to get a clearer idea of your hierarchy one of these days. Honestly, I was just going to offer to tell them off verbally, but it has been a while since I exercised my power.

How disruptive would it be if every time they picked up an intoxicant beverage to drink it, it simply froze in their hands?

Re: For Glit

[glitterdoc]

That would just be hilarious. And it sounds like the sort of thing Soundwave would love.

I also don't think Soundwave or Howlback would specifically mind you telling them off, necessarily. Just that they ought to know.

I think the hierarchy is a work in progress. Class warfare is Soundwave's passion and speciality; he's trying to figure out how to balance having an efficient organisation with not wanting to establish anything even remotely like castes.

for Ravage

[coldsong]

[Continued from here.]

He mentioned the doll was probably a character from a show you liked, but I didn't get more detail than that.

Oh Norns. If she hasn't figured out it can do that already, I give it less than a week. Thank you for the warning!

Re: for Ravage

[dontpetmeibite]

I didn't realise it myself until I thought about how big those dolls are and how big Una isn't.

Dazzlestar is a very cute character. She's a dancer and an acrobat. That may be why he picked her and not the Prince of the Mountains, who I dressed up as for Halloween.

(And wish I hadn't.)

Soundwave

[coldsong]

continued from here

I have not heard the term 'emotional ecosystem' before, but it's very apt. That's my feeling, as well, that we are all connected, at least indirectly. It's a strange feeling for me. I do have friends, and lovers, and family, but there is a relationship here that is different from my past experiences. Your culture is more emotionally open than mine, and there are different connotations to varying types of physical intimacy with you. It's fascinating, and I...am still feeling my way, I think, but you and Ravage have become important to me in a very short length of time.

I have a history with mind control via a magical artifact, for lack of a better term. I was a perpetrator, but also a victim. Sometimes I think I still hear it, and some of my memories are...unreliable. Mostly the emotional context of them; I can sort out the actual events that occurred for the most part, but it still troubles me.

What was done to me had nothing to do with interrogation. It was half an effort to make a puppet of me, and half meaningless brutality. It's better I don't talk about it much beyond that.

When you say 'intrusive thoughts'. What do you mean 'everyone has them'?

Re: Soundwave

[soundwave_ascendant]

We don't have to talk about things you don't want to talk about, but if you think of them when we're actually in contact, I will probably get at least flashes before I shut them down. Which I will do, most likely, unless something about them transfixes or triggers me.

I meant exactly what I said. Everyone has them.

Antheans don't often seem to have the really violent ones, but everyone has them. If you were thinking, as some people seem to do, that nobody else in the world thinks the terrible things you have thought without meaning to think them, you're absolutely wrong.

Being Cybertronian makes it easier to consciously delete them, but only if you don't get caught up in them and become anxious before you remember you're able to do that.

Your brain stores everything rather haphazardly and if you don't sleep or enter defragmentation cycles often enough, things that don't go together at all are stored right next to each other. Sometimes when you're not thinking consciously, you'll retrieve different concepts that don't go together and most of the time you won't pay attention because it's simply absurd. But sometimes the random brain stimulation means you generate something horrible, particularly when you're really angry or frustrated.

It doesn't mean anything unless you decide you like the awful idea. And even if you like it enough to entertain it briefly, but not enough to do it, it still doesn't count, because you didn't do it.

Unfortunately, I get to share these anyway sometimes, particularly when they're upsetting enough that the person who's having them pays attention to them. But yes, we all have them. I certainly do. I've had plenty of awful thoughts about people I love, but as long as I find them repugnant, I don't need to worry that I'll ever want to do them.

Ravage

[coldsong]

continued

Wait...wait, I think we are talking of different things, with the same words, and that is creating confusion. I truly don't care who he has sexual relations with as long as there is no harm exchanged (except that I will never share a lover with Thor, for numerous reasons, but he's not interested in anyone right now so that is moot). But the level of intimacy that interfacing creates between two of your kind is more intense than a simple tumble in bed, friends-with-benefits situation. Up until now, I would have said I don't object to him sharing that with you, either, but the more I hear of your pasts and the more I learn of the way you interact with one another, the less I like the idea of the two of you together.

So in that sense you are correct. I would prefer you not interface if you cannot do so without being toxic to one another. I'm less certain of how he and Soundwave interact, aside from this most recent minor disaster.

But beyond that, I want to be a part of this. I don't mean that I want to be romantically or sexually involved with you or Soundwave. Just that there is a sense of...security or warmth or...something. Associated with you. The two of you, or the three of you...

I wonder if it's something I'm picking up from his spark?

Or maybe I'm just looking for more emotional connections now that the work I thought would be the end of me is finally done, and I have a chance to build something different.

Re: Ravage

[dontpetmeibite]

I think you are part of this. And I am perfectly fine with that. I also think this is a conversation we should all be having together, and probably not via text message. It's a conversation that might go better if we were at least able to look into each other's faces. Personally, I'd prefer to have it in close physical contact with all of you--not in a romantic or sexual way, but in a comforting way.

I think Soundwave and Megatron ought to interface at least once without any funny business, so they can be absolutely clear how they feel about each other. And I said that to Soundwave when he was telling me he had to be a dreadful little tease because he promised me he wouldn't have sex with anyone else. I told him it was ridiculous of him to say they didn't have sex because nobody came and no spikes were touched, and also that I forgave him but I wouldn't if he ever tried that one again. They were in each other's ports. They didn't get into any of the really fun ones, but I don't see how frustrating each other is helpful. It was pure pettiness and I made him own up to it.

I don't consider this a minor disaster. I consider it positive. It would've been a minor disaster if they'd tried to hide it from us. Instead, they told us the truth, and we didn't let them get away with any foolishness.

A lot of this is about their pride. About Soundwave's wounded pride, in particular, and his consciousness of Megatron's pride. I'll feel good about whatever they elect to do once Soundwave finally has set his pride aside and cried his optics dry in Megatron's arms, and Megatron has had to apologise to him for hurting him, not hurting me.

For Abner

[coldsong]

((Continued from here))


That the car that hit him is not present--and neither are there any police or ambulance sirens--strikes Loki as irritating. Either Abner managed to get a fair distance with a non-functional leg, or it was a hit-and-run. If it was the latter, he might have to find the vehicle that hit him and take some subtle vengeance later. Although, since the man doesn't want to go to the hospital, it may be all for the best.

"Aren't you chilly, lying on the ground like that?" He looks down at him for a moment quizzically, hands on his hips, and then crouches beside him easily. "Going into shock is the last thing you want. Can you feel your feet?"

Florence Nightingale, he ain't, but he's done battlefield triage, and he at least has enough compassion to pull off his cloak and tuck it around the injured man rather than comment on his questionable fashion sense.

[youremom]

Abner is experienced and adept at being on the absolute brink of death and calmly insisting that he is fine. It’s just a rash. I just slipped. I was only dead for a little while.. A hospital is no place for someone like him. Even top infectious disease specialists wouldn’t know what to do with him. And the thought of anyone in a lab coat with an examination table trying is enough to make him break out in a cold sweat.

The people who hit him aren’t entirely to blame for moving along. He hadn’t laid down until their car was out of sight.

“Oh. A little, I guess,” he answers, as if temperature hadn’t previously occurred to him and he isn’t really bothered. He’s actually quite cold. He’s still in a sort of teenage experimental stage of dressing himself, having never gotten the chance before. But he does also hang out with Harley Quinn who is an…interesting sartorial influence.

He props himself up on his elbows as he suddenly finds himself cloaked. The chill had been a nice distraction. The cloak is also a nice distraction. It feels expensive.

“I can feel everything,” he reports, “and move everything, I just can’t put weight on it.”

He gestures to the leg with the torn knee.

for mysticaldoctor

[coldsong]

continued

Good, good. Loki would have eaten them himself, but it would make for a lot of carbs in one sitting. He apparently had them in a pocket dimension, so he's quick to pull them out, still in the bakery box, and set them on the counter.

And he goes for the teacups rather than the mugs, since he's been given the option, then comes up with a kitchen knife, possibly from the same place the buns came from, and carefully cuts some of the leaves away from the stems.

"It's better if you bruise the lemon balm before steeping," he says. "I'm not actually much of a herbalist myself, but my mother taught me a few tricks. Lucky this was one of them."

"So, dare I ask what the glorious occasion was that prompted all this? Clearly you won the fight or you wouldn't be here." Once the leaves are prepped to his liking, he puts them in the cups, then helps himself to the hot kettle and pours the water directly over them.

Re: for mysticaldoctor

[mysticaldoctor]

He kept his hands tucked in the cape and watched. The lemon balm smelled nice. It was from some ancient plant in the garden. He thinks the way Loki speaks of his mother that he probably liked her.

"I told you, I was in a fight and it ... took a lot out of me. I can't just use magic without recourse, and it has to build back up before I - go do it again. I also wouldn't count ... what I did as 'winning'. If I did it's not - the sort of winning I like."

Stephen would rather not talk about it, it was better to think about the tea and the cardamom buns. "How else did your mother foster your magical skill?" Changing the subject. Not - did she teach you magic, it's the assumption Loki being what he was - he already would have had ability, but it would have needed encouragement.

@Kate

[coldsong]

Continued

Let's put it this way: he's not wrong.

[Almost anything Clint can say about Loki is bound to be true on some level. He knows him better than most. It's just that his knowledge is colored by an understandably uncharitable opinion. Loki would argue he was having a psychotic break at the time, which is true, but he wasn't as far from his baseline as he'd like to think he was, either.]

If I had a nickel for every time Thor said those words to me, I would have a sack full of nickels I could hit him with the next time he comes to me with a stupid plan.

But no, like Thor, you're an intelligent person who occasionally lets emotion cloud your ability to strategize. [Her second plan makes much more sense.]

Full disclosure, I don't want to do that either. But for you, I will.

Thanks for setting this up! <3

[hawk_shot]

[It was probably another mistake, bringing Clint into this. Because while Kate knows Loki won't hold it against her, she's trying to prove to him - and even herself - that he's not as bad as the world believes him to be.]

Well, jokes on you and Clint and my mom. Because I actually don't need anybody's influence to be a mess.

[Maybe in her mom's and Clint's eyes a little of a disappointment, even. How could they understand she- She enjoys hanging with Loki of all people?]

Well, maybe you just need to be a little more patient with Thor and his plans. Strategy sometimes takes time. You can't just come up with the perfect plan at the first go!
And better keep your bag of nickels to yourself.

[See? This is it. The guy is openly saying he doesn't wanna do this, but he's making an effort. Just because she asked. Kate re-reads his last text a couple of times, the flutter in her chest something she is only starting to actually acknowledge.]

Good. Because I wanna hang out with your more and I'm not gonna hide it to keep my mom from texting me while she freaks out.

[coldsong]

continued

I don't know, empathy or something? You project arrogance but there's some real underlying humility about what a disaster you can be that I find relatable.

Also I'm actively trying to establish a cease-fire with Thor's friend group for his sake.

[hottestofmesses]

Let me help you then. Calling someone a disaster, even if relatably so, isn't really the best way to stop animosity. Not that I'm feeling particularly prickly.

[coldsong]

from here

You mean the cat, right? I've been one, off and on, but I'm not sure that makes me an expert.

Either that or he knows where food for domestic cats comes from. Hello, darling. [He offers his fingers to let the cat sniff him.] Actually, there are probably animal smells all over the bag itself. They had a big cage of rats in there.

[eyeofthehawk]

Apart from occasionally looking after Alpine for a week, I'm a dog guy and completely outta my league here.

[Garm meows in response before sniffing the offered hand.] Sure you don't want him, he seems to like you and pets can be very therapeutic.

[coldsong]

continued

What they say on Wikipedia, even when not suspect, is barely a fraction of the real story, for any of us.

It was a slow change. Decades slow. I don't know. I'm not even sure how Thor would answer that question because his memories don't match mine. I remember the bright and beloved prince, reveling in his own glory, and how I slowly turned from his closest confidante into a prop, or an ill-behaved pet. He held me close with one hand and made me the target of petty insults with the other.

I remember being told to know my place.

He's not that man any longer, though, and I can't trust my own memory. I'm not sure he'll ever understand that.

TY!

[endof_theline]

Ah, Wikipedia. I've glanced at it, but I haven't delved in. It's daunting.

Doesn't sound right.
Doesn't sound like a reason to murder a lot of people over either, but- it doesn't sound right either way.

Memories are a weird and fickle thing. Mine are all fragmented too. I don't think anyone really understands them.